The Correction: Entry 05 – Consistent presence.

Title: The Correction: Entry 05

Consistent presence.

Two words. That’s all it took.

I’ve been giving this to people my whole life without knowing it had a name. The check-ins. The random call just to say I’m thinking of you. Keeping someone in your day, not just your contacts list.

That’s been my love language since before I knew what a love language was.

And somewhere underneath all of this — underneath the utility and the hyper competence and the not receiving — was a man who simply wanted this returned. Not grand gestures. Just — are you there? Regularly. Without agenda.

Let me be clear about what consistent presence is not. It’s not a thousand messages. Not a running commentary on your day. Not constant availability or performative closeness. It’s simpler than that. It’s when something happens and you think of me. Not because you need something. Not because there’s an agenda. Just because I’m somewhere in your day. A check in. A random thought shared. The equivalent of turning to someone in a room and saying — did you see that. That’s it. You either do it naturally or you don’t. And the people who do — you know exactly who they are without having to think about it.

Those people are my inner circle.

The ones who don’t leave a specific kind of gap. Not loud. Quiet. The kind you feel in the in-between moments. When something happens and you reach for your phone and then put it back down.

What I’ve learned about myself is this — I tell them. Not dramatically. Just directly. I say I’d like us to talk more. I suggest we link up. I create the opening. And something shifts for a while. And then it doesn’t. And I create the opening again. Until one day I stop.

Not out of anger. Out of clarity.

That’s the part that hurts. Not the distance. The decision. Letting go of someone you genuinely appreciate. Holding the love and the leaving at the same time and knowing they can both be true.

Consistent presence is the standard. Not a high one. Not unreasonable. Just — are you there?

That’s what I need. That’s what I deserve.

I think I’ve always known it. I just never had the words.

The Correction: Entry 05. More to come.